Love Potion #9 is a wonderful song, but the love potion I’m talking about doesn’t come from a gold-capped toothed woman named Madame Ruth on 34th and Vine and it certainly shouldn’t be brewed in the kitchen sink.
No… I’m talking about Amortentia. The most powerful love potion in the world according to the wizarding world of Harry Potter. You know the one, with its distinctive mother-of-pearl sheen and spiraling steam that rises gently from the top. Another telltale sign of Amortentia are the multifaceted scents it gives off depending on the person inhaling its fumes.
What originally made me want to post about Amortentia (Harry Potter obsession aside, ahem…) was the overwhelming scent of honeysuckle that slapped me in the face just the other day.
Honeysuckle has long been a favorite scent of mine and is associated with so many happy memories that I cannot help but smile softly whenever I smell it. It’s such a favorite scent that I think if it were a wand wood choice for Ollivanders, my wand would definitely have been made of it instead of Ash.
Naturally, when I thought of honeysuckle being part of my Amortentia potion, I immediately thought of what the rest of it would smell like.
It would consist of honeysuckle, pool water and dragon’s blood incense. Pool water makes me think of my childhood when I would go with my mom to the public pool every day during the summer.
The Dragon’s Blood incense is purely brought to mind because of my husband, who is the one ultimately responsible for my happiness and contentment in life. It’s his favorite scent of incense and we burn it often.
Before he came into my life, I would say my third scent would have been freshly mown grass, just like Hermione. But like Nymphadora Tonks’ Patronus changing with her growing love for Remus, my Amortentia includes the one I love most in this world.
So! With that being said, what would your potion smell like?
And for those who might be curious… I’m a Hufflepuff Alum, my Patronus is a Weasel and my wand is Ash, 11 3/4, Brittle and the core is a Dragon heartstring. I like to think the dragon who kindly supplied it would have been an Antipodean Opaleye.
Prepares yourself, Reader, for something potentially unpleasant. 😉
My favorite word begins with a C and it’s not Crass. It’s Cunt!
Shit… it’s also Cat and Cocaine and Curio. I’m just a big, fat liar it seems.
If you’re shocked, then I’m ashamed of you! You of all people ought to know just how trashy I am and it should come as no surprise that I lack all class. However, Cunt may be one of my favorite words but I don’t go around saying it all willy-nilly. It’s reserved for special occasions where I’m either talking about my lady bits to the south or someone especially deserving of the word when they’re being rude af.
So there you go. I’m a tacky bitch, lol. What are some of your favorite words? Go ahead, be as trashy as you can be, I won’t tell.
*Trigger Warning: Talk of Depression, Anxiety and Suicide.*
Woke up a couple hours ago feeling pretty chipper. I’ve learned from a young age to not trust myself when I’m feeling this happy because I usually spiral into a rotten mood and bitter tears.
Ahhh, gotta love depression and bouts of shitty mania.
Pretty sure I’ve been depressed since I was a young child. Can’t really remember though because I’ve blocked a giant portion of my past memories. I tried to see a therapist once, but she looked like she was my age and I just couldn’t handle talking to someone who didn’t seem like she’d understand where I was coming from. I felt like I needed someone much older, who had lived through some shit and lived to tell the tale.
So I passed up on the therapy which led to skipping on the option for medication and spiraled through years of suicidal thoughts until I finally took the plunge and downed twenty prescription sleeping pills and woke up in a pile of vomit. I think I was fifteen when that happened. I remember crawling to the toilet and then waking up later that day in bed. I know someone found the evidence of what had happened and yet nothing was ever said about it. Ever. No trip to the hospital, nothing.
I thank God every day that I survived.
I really didn’t mean to tumble down into this pit of darkness and despair. I mean, realistically, this blog can’t be all sunshine and kittens. Even as I’m typing this, it feels like this happened to someone else and I know I’ve dissociated hard from the girl who’s been through so much that she felt the need to kill herself. I know it isn’t healthy to ignore it all. And yet I do.
I am a veritable pro at ignoring things that make me uncomfortable and unhappy. Into the NOPE box it goes to never again see the light of day.
In the last year, in my effort to maintain my self-care, I went through Facebook and unfollowed (and some unfriended) nearly every one of my 90 friends and family until I was left with a timeline of cute animal videos, recipes and the posts of maybe five people. I just did not want to see anything negative at a time when I was feeling incredibly vulnerable.
Self-Care can be dangerous. Because I’d went through and blocked everyone’s posts, it’s helped me lose touch with my friends and family. And because I work third shift and sleep during the day, it’s been made worse in that I’m losing touch with the outside world.
I think all the time that I’m getting cabin fever and make plans and then when it creeps up to actually going out for said plans… I break out in a cold sweat and my anxiety soars and I eventually cancel going anywhere. The thought of being around anyone besides my hubs just makes me tremble and want to cry.
My anxiety has gotten so bad that I’m finally ready to throw in the towel and get some help. I don’t know if I’m ready to rehash every terrible thing that has happened in my life but I think I’m more than ready for the sweet relief of depression medication.
It’s very, very rare that I get one over hubby. When it happens, I just want to shout it to the world that I was the clever one for one brief, shining moment. Please, enjoy said moment that we had yesterday at our expense.
Me: How many animals did Moses have on the Ark?
Matt: One of each kind, apparently.
Me: *grinning like an idiot*
Matt: *repeats the question and immediately realises his error* Oh, shit…
Me: *cackling with joy*
On my last attempt at blogging, I began doing a topic on music named Manic Monday. In it I would list my current song obsessions, but I think this time around, I’ll just talk about one song at a time.
Today’s song is by Nick Cave and the Bad Seeds and is titled Do You Love Me? It brings to mind the relationship between The Bride and Bill in Kill Bill.
Seriously, if you haven’t seen the movies… then what is wrong with you? Go watch, chop, chop! I’ll post the lyrics below the video if you care to give them a read.
I found her on a night of fire and noise Wild bells rang in a wild sky I knew from that moment on I’d love her till the day that I died And I kissed away a thousand tears My lady of the Various Sorrows Some begged, some borrowed, some stolen Some kept safe for tomorrow On an endless night, silver star spangled The bells from the chapel went jingle-jangle
She was given to me to put things right And I stacked all my accomplishments beside her Still I seemed so obselete and small I found God and all His devils inside her In my bed she cast the blizzard out A mock sun blazed upon her head So completely filled with light she was Her shadow fanged and hairy and mad Our love-lines grew hopelessly tangled And the bells from the chapel went jingle-jangle
She had a heartful of love and devotion She had a mindful of tyranny and terror Well, I try, I do, I really try But I just err, baby, I do, I error So come and find me, my darling one I’m down to the grounds, the very dregs Ah, here she comes, blocking the sun Blood running down the inside of her legs The moon in the sky is battered and mangled And the bells from the chapel go jingle-jangle
All things move toward their end I knew before I met her that I would lose her I swear I made every effort to be good to her I swear I made every effort not to abuse her Crazy bracelets on her wrists and her ankles And the bells from the chapel went jingle-jangle
For those that don’t really haunt YouTube, there was a live cam set up for the much anticipated birth of April the Giraffe’s baby over the last couple months at the Animal Adventure Park in New York. April gave birth today and the cam is still live so y’all can see just how freaking adorable the baby is. Click HERE to go get your fill of cuteness.
Hubby beat me to posting about the event, which you can read about HERE. I posted about watching baby being born on Facebook and then I too hit the hay. Because I sleep during the day and hubby is usually up before I am, he got to see the negativity on FB regarding April’s baby. It’s sad af.
People are so mired in the terrible shit going on that they can’t appreciate the beauty and wonder of a precious baby entering the world. Not only that but they’re bitching about people participating in something positive while countless other negatives are occurring around the world.
Welp, sorry not sorry, but I’m not going to wallow in negativity just to please your shitty sensibilities. The hubs said it best, I think, when he said Hopefully something similar to these two events will come along to replace them when they’re done and out of the spotlight. This is what the world needs more of more than ever. It lifted our spirits for a moment, and for that, I’m very grateful.
On a side note, I’ve been watching TinyKittensHQ for the last few weeks. TinyKittensHQ is a feral cat rescue that aims to save as many feral cats as they can, rehabilitating and finding them homes whenever possible and when they can’t, they spay/neuter and return them to the wild.
Their latest rescued pregnant momma’s are Evolene, a ginger tabby who has suffered seriously from malnutrition among many other very serious health problems. The other momma is Corsica, a tortoiseshell tabby who seems to be in better health and is a couple years younger. Sadly, all five of Evolene’s kittens passed away and Evolene herself is struggling to thrive. TK’s are doing everything possible to facilitate her speedy recovery, jsyk…
Corsica, on the other hand, had five kittens as well and all are doing so very well. They’re just about seven days old and haven’t opened their eyes yet, but if you’d like to join in another spot of brightness, then click HERE.
What I’ve been trying to say all along here, is… Don’t let anyone drag you down when you’re enjoying something that brings you a bit of happiness in this otherwise crazy world. The negativity in the world is going nowhere and will continue spreading like a terrible plague, but the rare moments of goodness? Take advantage when you can and be grateful it happened and that you were able to witness it.
The hubs showed this to me this morning and I’m sad to say he beat me to the punch by associating the word blow with, well, blow… Even though I said the dolphin could put it directly in its blowhole. But, now we know the air hole atop a dolphins’ head is used for Blow and not breathing. ‘Cause who needs air, amirite???
You ever find a dish that you could just eat every damn day and be happy af? For me, that would be this crab casserole from a place called Asian Buffet. Hubs and I have always called it Crab Stuff. I don’t get it very often and when the craving hits me, it drives me insane because the place takes a good twenty minutes to get to and it isn’t cheap at all, even with a coupon from our Reach magazine.
The craving hit me last night while I was at work and I had the harebrained idea that I’d just get the ingredients from Walmart on my way home and make it then. How’d it turn out? Well, maybe next time the craving hits, I’ll wait until they open and hit them up for lunch. Let’s just leave it at that, haha.
I’m not a bad cook by any means, it’s just… not the same as how Asian Buffet makes it. Tomorrow, for Easter, I’m delving into making a Strawberry Poke Cake. I’ll let y’all know how well that fails.
I was half asleep when I was scrolling through Facebook yesterday and saw the hubs had posted #RIPCharlieMurphy and didn’t really pay it any attention until I rolled around some more and finally got up to get ready for work last night. That’s when I finally figured out that it was true… The great Charlie Murphy had died at the young age of 57 from his long battle with leukemia.
I legit cried. (Which is no surprise since my every emotion is tied to my tear ducts.) I watched his skits on the Chappelle Show often because it’s seriously the funniest shit, ever. His True Hollywood Stories were the best. My favorite, however, was the one about his frequent run-ins with Rick James.
I originally wasn’t going to make this a post. I was just going to put up the above gif on my About page and leave it at that, but… I thought about poor Charlie and here we go. But while I’m on the subject of cocaine… *sighs wistfully*
Haven’t done it in years, but, man, it was lovely when I did. Don’t judge me.