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NOT TODAY, SATAN!

For those who haven’t picked up on it yet, I work at a hotel as a night auditor. By the time I get to work at 11pm, it’s usually a ghost town and I have the place to myself.

The last hotel I worked at was more of a resort, you may have even heard of it. I’m talking about the Great Wolf Lodge. I did two stints there. If you’re thinking me saying “stints” sounds like jail, then you would be correct and you get a brownie.

That place… It really was hell. I was there for about two years the first time and it was a real eye-opener and a shitty introduction to the hospitality industry. You would think a thousand+ screaming and laughing children would have been the downside but I honestly loved that. The kids were the absolute best part about working for that hellhole.

(Side note: I am SHOCKED that “hellhole” is an actual word in the dictionary, lol.)

My second stint there lasted almost five years until I was wrongfully fired on Thanksgiving of 2015. (More on that in another blog post.) Both times were hell because my coworkers and management, bar a very select few, were terrible individuals. Catty, petty, gossipy. I hated it there but I loved the money I was making and that I had achieved 7 almost solid years at a workplace.

It wasn’t until I started working for the hotel I’m at now that I truly understood that the only good thing to come of my 7 years at the GWL was that I cut my teeth on almost every possible terrible situation that could happen in a hotel.

It prepared me to be able to handle anything that crops up at the new hotel, which is still, frankly, a breath of fresh air to me. For the first couple of months at the new place I was a very tightly wound wire and my boss had to take me aside and explain that they weren’t going to bite my head off and that I could relax. That they understood how shitty the GWL is. I wanted to cry. Seriously…

Almost a year and a half later and I’m still so happy. I love everyone I work with, management has my back in every situation, the hotel is beautifully designed. I have zero complaints. Sort of.

My one complaint shouldn’t be a complaint, but it is. As a night auditor at the GWL, the work required spanned about 5 or so hours over the 8 hour shift. Not to mention it had to contend with the myriad of angry guests, hundreds of room requests, millions of phone calls and various other unpleasant shit that went on in any given night.

As a night auditor for the new hotel, my work is completed in an hour, guests are typically asleep before I come in at 11 and the phone rarely rings, and when it does, it’s usually a guest asking for a wake-up call.

The rest of my time is typically devoted to reading a book or scrolling tumblr or facebook on my phone until about 6 and then I hang out at the front desk to greet guests as they come down in the morning for breakfast or whatever they happen to need.

It gets boring af. And when I get bored, I get bitchy and antsy and anxious and all that downtime that my brain is not engaged in a book, it’s battling with memories from like fifteen years ago when I did something and now I wonder if that person from back then still thinks about what I did and are they still angry and omg, anxiety!!! Stupid brain.

The boredom is the only thing I have to complain about. Usually. Some nights, like last night, was hectic AF. Sold out, certain room types overbooked, had to change guests original booking to smaller rooms, unhappy guests, make them happy within reason.

We’re sold out again tonight and I’m not looking forward to the potential mess that I’ll be traipsing in to. Since I left work this morning I’ve been dreading going in tonight. As of right now it’s about 9:30 at night and I’ve been watching the clock since until I just slapped myself an hour or so ago when I reminded myself that this hotel isn’t the GWL and that I’m grateful AF for the lessons it taught me and that I can more than handle anything that crops up with a grace and dignity that I never had while working for the GWL.

I have it so good. I legit love my job. It literally takes one moment to remember how bad I had it at the last place to remember those two facts and then all is right in my little trashy world.

So… lemme pull on my big girl panties, put on some fucking makeup and give the GWL a middle finger. (Not gonna lie. If we ever have to drive by, I stick both middle fingers out of my window at them. Childish? You fucking bet!)

With all of that in mind, it’s easy to say, “Not today, Satan, not today.”

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Totes need this patch, btw.
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ALL THE SMALL THINGS!

Between a combination of writer’s block and a wonky internet connection, I’ve found it difficult to post on a near daily basis like I was. Also, if you think for one moment I’d take pen to paper and post it later, you’re crazy! Instead, I’ll leave you hanging for a few days because hey, absence makes the heart grow fonder, right? I’ll just give you some highlights of the past week and whatnot… Don’t hurt me, please.

  1. Our router, which is still brand new, crapped out for some reason a few nights ago and we couldn’t figure out what the hell was going on. I finally discovered it was my laptop, which I had plugged directly into the router. Unplugged it and voila! It has been a-okay ever since.
  2. I’ve had some serious brain fog going on which has attributed to my writer’s block. All I’ve wanted to do is sleep, sleep, sleep. When I wasn’t sleeping, I could barely function or think rationally. I’ve worked third shift for many years now and never had any issues staying wide awake, but the last couple nights I’ve caught myself nodding off. Ugh… hope that passes soon.
  3. Money’s been a little tight and we’ve been dangerously close to not having any food in the house. Thankfully, family has seen us through in making sure we have enough to eat. We’re eternally grateful for their love and care. We also went to a non-profit called Valley Interfaith Community Resource Center and they’ve paid our gas and electric bill for the next month in addition to the groceries they sent us home with. Can’t express just how relieved we are with all of their help.
  4. The hubs and I are celebrating our 7 year wedding anniversary on May 1st. We had originally planned to get all dolled up and go out for a fancy dinner at Olive Garden* where we’d buy a whole bottle of wine and make a night of it. Scrapped that idea (see #3) and decided we’d go to the Cincinnati Zoo and see the new baby hippo Fiona. Scrapped that idea, too, because they’ve gotten so expensive. So now we’re going to see an early morning movie, get some lunch, drive around all day and then go home and get liquored up with some finger foods on the side. Honestly, that last idea suits us much better than the fancy dinner anyway.

    *Hey, Olive Garden is fancy for us. Shutchomouf.

    So, that’s been our week in this little nutshell. The moral of the story is to sleep when your body says it needs it.

    Don’t be proud… When you need help, utilize your available resources and accept the well-meaning help of your friends and family when they offer it. When you’re in a position to help others, it’s good being able to appreciate both ends of the spectrum.

    If your electronics are acting like an asshole, unplug it and plug it back in. That always seems to be the resolution, lol.

    Finally, learn to have just as good a time on a smaller budget as you would on a larger one. You’d be surprised with what you can come up with when you’re financially strapped. (But there’s nothing wrong with treating yourself, either.)

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    Thank you, Donna Meagle, we will.
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APRIL THE GIRAFFE!

For those that don’t really haunt YouTube, there was a live cam set up for the much anticipated birth of April the Giraffe’s baby over the last couple months at the Animal Adventure Park in New York. April gave birth today and the cam is still live so y’all can see just how freaking adorable the baby is. Click HERE to go get your fill of cuteness.

Hubby beat me to posting about the event, which you can read about HERE. I posted about watching baby being born on Facebook and then I too hit the hay. Because I sleep during the day and hubby is usually up before I am, he got to see the negativity on FB regarding April’s baby. It’s sad af.

People are so mired in the terrible shit going on that they can’t appreciate the beauty and wonder of a precious baby entering the world. Not only that but they’re bitching about people participating in something positive while countless other negatives are occurring around the world.

Welp, sorry not sorry, but I’m not going to wallow in negativity just to please your shitty sensibilities. The hubs said it best, I think, when he said Hopefully something similar to these two events will come along to replace them when they’re done and out of the spotlight. This is what the world needs more of more than ever. It lifted our spirits for a moment, and for that, I’m very grateful.

On a side note, I’ve been watching TinyKittensHQ for the last few weeks. TinyKittensHQ is a feral cat rescue that aims to save as many feral cats as they can, rehabilitating and finding them homes whenever possible and when they can’t, they spay/neuter and return them to the wild.

Their latest rescued pregnant momma’s are Evolene, a ginger tabby who has suffered seriously from malnutrition among many other very serious health problems. The other momma is Corsica, a tortoiseshell tabby who seems to be in better health and is a couple years younger. Sadly, all five of Evolene’s kittens passed away and Evolene herself is struggling to thrive. TK’s are doing everything possible to facilitate her speedy recovery, jsyk…

Corsica, on the other hand, had five kittens as well and all are doing so very well. They’re just about seven days old and haven’t opened their eyes yet, but if you’d like to join in another spot of brightness, then click HERE.

What I’ve been trying to say all along here, is… Don’t let anyone drag you down when you’re enjoying something that brings you a bit of happiness in this otherwise crazy world. The negativity in the world is going nowhere and will continue spreading like a terrible plague, but the rare moments of goodness? Take advantage when you can and be grateful it happened and that you were able to witness it.

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KITSCH, PLEASE!

The hubs and I have been together for almost ten years and in that time, we’ve had to compromise on a great many things. On things such as… toilet paper brand, morals and personal taste. Juuust to name a few.

I’ve heard before that compromise in marriage is 99% of just giving in to your wife so you no longer have to listen to her whine and bitch and while that seems great to us ladies, it’s not fair at all to the hubs. Most of the time, though, mine doesn’t truly give a shit about getting his way because in things that truly matter, we really do see eye to eye. Still, doesn’t make it fair. But! What if it’s about something that truly matters to you?

Like I said, sometimes we’ve had to compromise on personal taste and my issue is this… I fracking love pink flamingos. Seriously. They’re my fave and I’ve always, aaaaallllwaaays… wanted to put those tacky, plastic pink flamingos in my front yard whenever I was finally able to buy a house. Some people enjoy garden gnomes,  but me? Hell no. Give me those plastic beauties any day.

Hubs has very rarely disagreed with how I decorate our home, but when it comes to the delightfully tacky birds, well, he’s pretty vocal in his displeasure with the idea. And it’s not as if I’d be putting out a whole flock!

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This isn’t overkill at all.

99.9% of the time, he lets me have my way. But I fear this time, when we’re finally able to move out of our one room shanty and into our long-time coveted mobile home… I may not be able to take the trashiness to the next level by including my beloved rosy artificial avians friends.

So, in the event where neither can compromise, where do we go? Who will get their way in the battle of the tacky pink flamingos in front of the trailer? Should I just ditch the idea and go for a concrete goose that I can decorate for the seasons? Should this is the .1% where I give hubby his way?

I don’t know. I’m still clinging pretty tightly to my wishes. What would you do?