Convos With the Hubs

CAN I GET A BUMP?!

Hubs and I should have our own show… Honestly.

Him: Ah, this turned out fucking great, if I do say so myself.
Him: Funny.
Him: Almost ready to post.
Me: Woo, woo! I’m trying to catch up on my reading list now. You’ll be number 2381290387.
Him: Can you bump me one up or so?
Me: Uh… *inserts gif*

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Him: ROFL
Me: Lol, of course I’ll bump you up.
Him: WOOHOO! *inserts pic*
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Sorry y’all, guess my duty as a wife trumps my duty to CDO in reading these posts in order, lol. If y’all are interested in what he posted, it IS fucking funny and you should totally read it. JUST DO IT!

Random Raves, Rants & Rambles

THROUGH THICKET AND THIN!

The last two days have not been good for me in a mental capacity. My thoughts, especially, have been like a thicket. I hate brain fog with a passion. There’s so much I want to write about (and it’s a good thing I have a list to put my post ideas on), but when I sit down to smash it out on the keyboard, nothing happens and my ADHD kicks in and all of a sudden I’ve been trawling youtube for 18 hours.

I think Sunday will be a random thoughts kinda day. For those little things that don’t really require a post of their own, ya know? So… I’ll just ramble here for today and get back next week with a spectacularly uninspiring blog post about something inconsequential to wow and amaze my friends. Have I mentioned that this blog is legit trash? Hey, you’re the one who decided I was worth following, so you get to deal with the fallout.

1. I realized I need a meat hammer. I could have cut down my cooking time on the giant chicken boobs from dinner a few nights ago if I had only had a meat hammer. But I’m strangely resistant to using things that normal adults would use. I distinctly remember the times my mom would use her meat hammer and it was loud af. Every time I think of it, I think about how she was such a better adult then than I am now. But mostly, I remember that it was loud.

For those of you who don’t know, hubs and I share a house with his mother and the sound carries very well. Also, we keep weird time since I work third shift. It would have woken her up for sure. If you’re curious about the house set up, the house itself is a cottage type and we live in the very back in an addition that was built on in the early 70s. We pretty much live in a small studio. Back to the meat hammer… guess I’ll pull up my big girl bloomers and put it on my list of shit I need to buy soon. *sigh*

2. Maintaining friendships on social media is tiring af. It’s also, apparently, a one way street. In August last year, I decided I needed to unfollow some people and limit my timeline to a very select few friends and family and videos of cute animals, crafts, recipes and shit. It was a desperate attempt to block out all the negativity I’d been seeing on Facebook for a long time. I even posted on there that I needed to take a break from Facebook but that I could always be contacted via Messenger.

A few weeks ago, I decided to go back through my friend list and re-follow everyone because I was in a good place where I felt I could handle all the talk of politics and every other Debbie Downer conversation that takes place on social media (but shouldn’t). So as I’m scrolling through my list of people, I notice that someone deleted me. And not just on Facebook, but on all of my other platforms as well.

This someone, I had thought, was good enough friends with me, that she’d at least message me to talk it, whatever IT was, out, before just haring off and deleting me. She’s a good online friend of the hubs, has been since before he and I met. He messaged her to find out what happened and she came back with some cockamamie excuse about we hadn’t spoken to each other in a while. *blink blink*

To be quite honest, it fucking hurt my feelings. Hubs told her so and she came back with the lame suggestion of, “Well, I could re-add her?” No. That ship sailed and you’re not allowed back on it. I didn’t realize a friendship of ten years had suddenly required talking to each other on a regular basis and that, my loves, is why maintaining friendships on social media is exhausting.

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JK… I’m too friendly. Disregard my personal space.

3. There is no number three that I can think of and I’m now realizing that number two really could have been a post of its own,  but… it’s here now and you’ll just have to deal with my longwindedness. Actually, there is a #3… Back to my mental capacity and perpetual brain fog… Poor hubby has had to explain super simple things to me the last couple of days. It bothers tf out of me because I’m usually a really sharp tack. Three separate times he’s tried to talk to me about something and I argued with him about how it didn’t make any sense to me. Wow. Really need this brain fog to gtfo.

So, those are a few of my rambles and rants for now. I know I’ll have a heap more by next Sunday. Hope everyone had a lovely weekend. Pray for me that I make it unscathed to next Sunday, lol.

xoxo

Convos With the Hubs

ONE-LINER WEDNESDAY // SIT DOWN ON IT!

I’m a few minutes late posting this, but hubby said to post it anyway because it’s still Wednesday somewhere… So, here you go!

The owner of the hotel I work at loathes when we front desk people leave our office door open. We’ve flouted those rules for a very long time now, but apparently, no longer. We have a new regional director and she told me tonight that it can’t stay open anymore. Sucks for me because I like lurking in dark places and watching the cameras to see who approaches the desk before I make my attack. Naturally, I complained to the hubby and said…

Me: I’ll have to buy a cushion for the table I like to sit on while I’m at the desk.
Him: Yeah.
Me: It hurts my hoo-ha after sitting on it a while.

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One-Liner Wednesday was brought to you by Linda G Hill.

 

Convos With the Hubs

LOYALTY VS LOGIC!

Hey y’all… I’m just popping back in to let you know I wrote a funny little piece over on my hubby’s blog at Martians Attack on the merits of loyalty and logic in your conversations.

Relationships are not easy to maintain, but sometimes, for the sake of levity, you must run roughshod over your partner with logic.

So! Give it a read! Wth are you waiting for?!

Besides, he’s funny af and you should be following him regardless. Just sayin’. ♥

Uncategorized

KITSCH, PLEASE!

The hubs and I have been together for almost ten years and in that time, we’ve had to compromise on a great many things. On things such as… toilet paper brand, morals and personal taste. Juuust to name a few.

I’ve heard before that compromise in marriage is 99% of just giving in to your wife so you no longer have to listen to her whine and bitch and while that seems great to us ladies, it’s not fair at all to the hubs. Most of the time, though, mine doesn’t truly give a shit about getting his way because in things that truly matter, we really do see eye to eye. Still, doesn’t make it fair. But! What if it’s about something that truly matters to you?

Like I said, sometimes we’ve had to compromise on personal taste and my issue is this… I fracking love pink flamingos. Seriously. They’re my fave and I’ve always, aaaaallllwaaays… wanted to put those tacky, plastic pink flamingos in my front yard whenever I was finally able to buy a house. Some people enjoy garden gnomes,  but me? Hell no. Give me those plastic beauties any day.

Hubs has very rarely disagreed with how I decorate our home, but when it comes to the delightfully tacky birds, well, he’s pretty vocal in his displeasure with the idea. And it’s not as if I’d be putting out a whole flock!

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This isn’t overkill at all.

99.9% of the time, he lets me have my way. But I fear this time, when we’re finally able to move out of our one room shanty and into our long-time coveted mobile home… I may not be able to take the trashiness to the next level by including my beloved rosy artificial avians friends.

So, in the event where neither can compromise, where do we go? Who will get their way in the battle of the tacky pink flamingos in front of the trailer? Should I just ditch the idea and go for a concrete goose that I can decorate for the seasons? Should this is the .1% where I give hubby his way?

I don’t know. I’m still clinging pretty tightly to my wishes. What would you do?